Wednesday, June 29, 2005

Erroneous Errors

How do you feel when you're working at your computer and you hear the infamous “ding” sound and a little window pops up telling you some silly error message?

Now, thanks to Tsykoduk, and his ever watchful eye, you can not only laugh at some rather hilarious error messages, but you can also make some of your own if you feel the need.

Is there anyone left that remembers the Amiga GURU Meditation errors? Somehow that was sort of Zen, but they weren't much more help then the Microsoft error messages are today.

As a network administrator I really enjoy the help messages that tell me to contact my network administrator. This is some lazy bastards way of saying, “I'm tired of writing all of these help messages so I'll just pawn it off on the local network administrator to figure out.”

I've got news for you Skippy! If you knew it was an error, and you know what the error was, why not clue us network administrators in on it so we can help the users out that have to put up with your poorly written programs! Yes, I think that hit a nerve.

I was about to say something clever like, “Can you imagine a world where everything we use has error messages?” Guess what, as I sat here thinking about this statement I realized we live in that world now.

Our cars no longer have “idiot lights” to tell us if we're out of oil, now the door is a jar, the airbag needs maintenance, our tire pressure is low, wiper fluid is low, etc...

These days microwaves, televisions, stoves, dishwashers, washers, dryers, games, telephones and pretty much most of the gadgets that have electronics in them will spew some sort of error message if properly coaxed. Luckily, many of these things do not blink cryptic errors at the frequency that our computers do. How quick would you trade in your washing machine if it “blue-screened” every other load?

Have fun with the error generator, and the next time your electronic gizmo blinks an error message at you just sit back, take a breath, count to ten, and try again, because I fear it's only going to get worse.

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